imaloser

sitting here listening to lovely craptastic midi of the Chip and Dale's Rescue Rangers theme song and just finished yet another mad lib type thing. Still ain't really done no schoolwork. anyway, here's the madlib type thing:
"



A Game of Pinball

------------------------------------------------------------------------


The other day, I played what is perhaps the most hasty pinball game I've ever seen. It was called "The Tense Scissors of Gerhard the Panda." The object of the game was to hit the ball with the flippers and the rotating cracker to get it to go through the Achey Tunnel of Hatred, thereby lighting the bonus pitchers which you could hit to enter the Super Going Whales Round. Alternately, if you hit the ball into the Ham-flavored Ramp, the Gyrating Busty Strippers of Torment would become activated, which earns you big bonus points if you hit all 7 of the Dustbunnies of Leaving within one minute. You can win an extra ball if you threaten the Villainous Bologna of Fishing, but only when all the Drop Flyers have been blew. It was a really muddy game, but after playing for a decade straight, my nipple was sore for a second. "

'the Gyrating Busty Strippers of Torment' - would that be a good name for a band? too long-winded. but it has a a nice ring to it. Okay, now I should go do something important. Wow, now I'm listening to a midi rendition of "Rock the Casbah". Rock.

mad muddled talez

"The Hanukkah Party

Last week my whole family went to a Hanukkah party at my Uncle Tom Hanks's house in Cloquet. The first thing we did when we got there was open presents. Uncle Tom Hanks always gives us silly presents. This year he gave me a turnip and my little sister, Courtney Love, a badass.

“squeek, Uncle Tom Hanks,” I said, “How did you know I wanted a turnip?”

Then Courtney Love, my cousins, and I played a dreidel game. My cousin Jesus put an empty bowl in the center of the table, and gave us each our own pile of candy for the game. Courtney Love went first, spun a shin, and had to put a piece of her candy in the bowl. I could tell she wanted to impale, but she knew she had to behave. The bowl continued to fill with candy, with most of us spinning shin. Then I spun a gimel. I got the whole bowl of candy!

On the way home, I whispered to Courtney Love that I would share my candy with her, but she had fallen fast asleep."


"Lessons Aesop Never Taught

And the moral of the story is…

Two corks don't make a jugs.

Never wiggle with elephant.

toss while you're ahead.

One jiggly boss deserves another.

A slippery tailpipe spoils the whole barrel.

The early jaguar catches the hose.

Slow and steady wins the jail.

A buntcake a day keeps Steve Irwin away.

gorilla of a feather butter together.

You can bring a ostrich to water, but you can't make it mangle."




"mad libs" style fill-in-the blank game for grades 3 and up!

also
official Mad Libs site. only 3 to do online. moderately lame-ish.

sum moore

an' som others

and a page 'o' links to even more.

now i am bored of damned things. ineed cough drops or some sort of throat easing medication. argh.
lips hurt.

i have been downloading fun fun midis all eve. for to work on a project for electronic music class. thee results i shall likely share with my fanbase at my myspace haven, it'll prolly be a couple weeks though. not due for a bit and i ain't even started yet. yup. got like 2 weeks. damned school. got too much of these damned schoolwork to do. but the electronic music is me favorite class. i am also liking much the photography. the other 2 are kind of hurting me though i am happy to have learned about maxmsp/jitter.
enough of this mucking about on internet. must work on skool shite. yes indeed.

bologna boloney

bologna.



semi-flexible mortadella bologna


frankfurt salchichon bologna



The Polyptich of Bologna


(link/picture gone)
Pat Bologna


(link/picture gone)
some man frisbee players in Bologna.


(link/picture gone)
Megan Bologna and Brittney Rogers



and now how about baloney?



(link/picture gone)
What Wave- Baloney Sandwich, A 1990 compilation album archived at the London Music Archives website.






Apparently this cat's name is Baloney.



"Baloney- The German AMD band. Pictured here are Frank (also the keyboardist for Clamdip), Ralf and Denis. Great show, guys!"



"Yesterday was my last day of employment in a popular global franchise chain retail store (Office Depot) located in Tel Aviv, Israel. My position was put at risk after I put a baloney sandwich into, what I seem to be aware of now, a "dairy only" shared toaster, near which there are no signs of warning. Nor are there any alternative toasters dedicated to my culinary pleasure and for me avoid the hurt emotions of my coworkers. The reason for my unemployment is "being egotistic" and "not caring for other folks' beliefs.""



"baloney is a twerp who tries to draw with his shaky, sweaty hands. he's very unorganized, which makes him use my buddy, the eraser, more than me. his drawings
usually show humanoid female characters who either look too happy or too forlorn or lethargic."







thank you and good day

snails are much faster than i?!

i am having a day. i have not yet decided what sort of day.
it is perhaps a good day, but more so perhaps mediocre.
i'm babbling.

my query of the moment would be thusly:

Anybody read this page, yo? besides the chick hawking her cholesterol site i mean(how heck did she find her way here? weird.).

Answer me!

Bastards!

hi it's thursday october 29th, i think.

i'm starting to worry i might be going a bit crazy. all this chaos and unhappiness seems to be choking out brain cells... something like that...

zizzer-zazzer-zuzz-zuzz-zuzz

it smells funny here
it's not me, i just took a shower, damn it!
did the dog dump somewhere? what's going on here?

i'm cold.

i want a glass of milk.
i want a glass of strawberry milk.
no.
i want banana milk! yum. banana flavored milk.
but i think nestle already discontinued it.
i was fond of that stuff. damn it.

chocolate would be good too.
damn dog.

i wish it were warmer. i wish it were hot and i could go swimming.


it would be interest to have larvae. but i'm not ready for children...
larvae. hmmm.
what a neat word.
larvae.

phallic larvae?
aagh.
glucose
phallus
phallic
larvae
cellulite
marinate
teamster
creme de menthe
marshmallow
cremaster
cedar
talc
vellum
sandpaper
musk
sombre
umbrella
teeter-totter
melon
coping
fluorescent
daedalus
deity
monotheistic
fluoride
fluids
stippled
buried
spermicide
maniacal
dungeon
papercut
plump
fluffer
cocktail
salt



hmm.

thirsty and confused

I'm wondering what life would be like if I'd grown up worshipping trees or the sun.
I'm wondering when the heck women shaving legs became natural and necessary... ?


?! > ? < !? -----------> aagh!!?!

more musings to come, most likely...

wishin' i was fishin'


going to eat cheerful-ohs, doubt they'll make anything better except nullifying the slight rumble in my belly...

fuck snapple

what is snapple? is it still around? have i ever had any?

i like v8 splash sometimes.
i am ever so fond of smoothies.

fruit is good thing. especially bananas. i have probably mentioned this before.

i need to go drink some fluids for the good of my body and brain.

my grasses abound with snakes

yes i hate everything. i need something to fix the angry and hating, it's unpleasant. i am going to go try some drinking and smoking but i doubt that will make me feel better for longer than an hour or two. a sandwich may improve my mood slightly. i do like sandwiches, if they are good.
i like cheese too. did i mention that? i am very fond of cheese. even though i still feel like i hate everything right now. i should acknowledge it's a momentary phase. i am bleeding. i have a headache. i am suffering from a lack of lunch and it's past dinnertime. my tooth hurts. i meant to go somewhere fun an hour ago and haven't gone yet cuz i feel crappy and haven't found ambition for moving. now it's getting quite late. i don't think i am going to go where i was going to go anymore. sigh. but i should consider feeding myself some tasty food item. then i will go someplace and intoxicate myself with overpriced beverages. blah.

dizzy dizzy dizzy in thee fucking head

florida tornadoes and oranges
funny how words repeat in my brain
are my sheets stained w/ orange juice, milk, or cum?

actually, i just did laundry the other day.

screaming cows porn acid god glow
orange

orange tinted porn-stars with fake tits.

yuck.

orgasms, ogres, jesus...

'i'm talking to myself again'

-- -- -- -- -- --
America you're an inhospitable bitch who cares little for her people
the everyday ordinary sorts that are your backbone
America what's wrong with you?
you need to drink more milk, learn to appreciate calcium
that's supposed to be a metaphor
like you know, backbone... appreciate and strengthen your backbone...

Guess what?

I ain't no Ginsberg.

need more drugs
only half homo

whatever

America one penny three dimes a nickel
2 rechargable batteries needing to be recharged
a red button for luck
a gold plastic card good for money in the bank, if I had some
a receipt from a chain sandwich shop
my id w/ a pic of me with orange hair
not quite smiling
a worn plastic telephone card
a student identification card
radio k music lover's card
deli stamp card from co-operative grocery
magnetic card good for all summer's city bus rides
red library card
medical insurance card
greyhound card with schedule to duluth, mn

(and that's just my right pocket)

America, I need bigger pockets. or more of them.

---

indeed indeed that could ramble on forever... a work in progress, for future revision. only the beginning. yup.
what're the current references? hmm

America I want to learn about the Black Panthers
I want to learn about traditions of resistance to
your headstrong selfish ways

America, I might be an anarchist
or at least a socialist
but it's unAmerican
to think or read of such things
so I can't make up my mind.

America, you're either with me or against me.
and I suspect
I know the answer to that.

America, my Mom took me to gay bars
when I was a kid,
even slipped me a sip or two
of her beer...
--

;)
yep, the possibilities for this are endless indeed indeed. but i have other things to do. things of grand importance!

been a long time having the usual headache hate you all

head heart hands... holes... headache, heartache, blood bleeding masterpieces all over
my front and back lawns

i do not own a lawn i have no garden

i need more books and more sunshine
exercise and vegetables
green things such as broccoli
and money! that's good too!

christ never gave me biscuits and i am sorry for everything i have ever ripped in two

not really. only some things.

my back hurts too.

i eat and drink too much sugary substances and have very bad teeth as a result

thusly my teeth also hurt oftentimes and too much


blech.


good nite.

more whining. sneeze. cough.

tired and unhealthy. unhealthier than usual.
stuffy nose. blecch.
horrid cough.
dry sore throat.
fucking fuck
and too much
schoolwork
so i am not
allowed sleep.
this is all my own damn fault.
for putting shit off till the
last minute.
my nose is stuffed and just about running right now.
:(

yawn.
previous post a headache/eyesore. i do still want whiskey, however.

today is friday the eleventh of march. i could claim to be having a bad day, mayhaps, but i haven't decided yet. being only four p.m. i am waiting and seeing how the rest of it happens.

i am sleepy.
strongly considering home for a nap. no mountainclimbing, or go-passing, or getting lost in the supermarket. just home and have a lie-down. sounds appealing. i like dreaming.

snowy snowing snow. pretty but it's cold and windy. i must procure a new hat.

anyone wanna help me cut my hair? i made a horrible mess of it.

yawn.

----- --- - - - - - - - -- - - - -- - -------- - -- - - - -
yawn

























by gum golly, i guess that's enough for today, noone on 56k is gonna be able to load all this...




concert last night:

it's five 'o' clock, do you know where your penis is?

whiskey whiskey whiskey
ah to be alone in a cabin on a marsh with naught but whiskey
and ducks
and i could eat the ducks
and be drunk all the time
on whiskey.

-
would also need stereo cd dvd vcr tv computer many cds dvds etcetera a fire a stove a microwave many delicious food items seven up to mix with the
whiskey maybe some vodka and kool aid for variation porn vibrators etcetera
magazine subscriptions
books books books
writing utensils and many blank notebooks
miscellaneous art supplies and creative creating things computer software and a digital video camera and my digital still camera
and bread and milk and my cat to help me catch the ducks
telephone

and why a marsh, why ducks i should just go somewhere warm and nice... hawaii? okinawa? but i want to be secluded with whiskey, wasn't that the point?

i'm craving something with good cheese right now, as well as alcohol. and i wouldn't mind getting laid or something. maybe i should skip class
go home stopping at liquor store and sit alone drinking and masturbating all evening.
or maybe not.

-------------------------------------------------- ---

random thoughts from class 3/8/05

garlic and root beer                                                                  today is tuesday, march eighth, 2005 a.d. 
                                                                                                      (today is a concept? what is today? living in the now...?)
salt helps conductivity, salt water, salted frozen meat

cold texture  touch sensor variable multi-speaker sounds
dark enclosed spa e, light??
 different textures? 

-salt    lemon-
-sugar   wasabi-

 earwax?  --- Harry Potter Jelly Belly Jelly Beans...


 toothbrush...


  angels, aura,      muscles

 salt kills slugs? 



---  ---    -- - - - - -- - -  - ------ - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -    -    -        -

-- - - - - - - -- ---

they even have a helpful video. (ew, says i...)


national ice center!



-- -- --
enuf krap 4 taday
---

np:

why is jesus chasing me

needing more random
more running
less headaches
fun in life should be
more often
less lemons
more sugar
i also like
salt







"...but the fruit of the poor lemon is impossible to eat."






salt is wicked cool, good for flavor, painful in wounds.



need go more punk rock shows, need more dancing, need more slam dancing pogoing craziness. w/ beer.